My Imaginary Friends: The Housewives

Even though I only leave my apartment around twice a month, I never feel lonely.

And that's because I have friends all across the country, from all walks of life.

NeNe, Teresa, Vicki...

My very best friend is of course the queen-- LISA VANDERPUMP.

And for the first time in all these years, I talked to her on the phone.

That's right, I called into Watch What Happens Live and I was the first caller.

It was the best of times and it was the worst of times. Yes I got to talk to my two heroes Andy Cohen and LISA. But in the terror of it all, I accidentally called her dog Puffy, the wrong name.

Anyways, here's the best moment of my life:

Planning your dog's birthday pawty

My dog is my child. I mean it.
I'm not one of those people who say their dog is a"fur baby". Tiny Dog is my literal baby.
She has a stroller, a couch, and she's even owned her own convertible.

Much like Jane Fonda, Tiny Dog is much older than she looks and she has an amazing figure.
Tiny Dog is 10!

So I had to plan her a birthday party.

Here's how you too, can plan the puppy party of the century:


Headshots- A good pet parent will have some sort of professional modeling portrait made of their dog. I personally chose to spend a huge chunk of my savings on a wedding photographer.

Invitations- Speaking of invites, now is the time to let your dog's beautiful face shine. Use those headshots for your dog's invites. Zazzle has great options!

Handmade replicas of your animal- Thankfully I had these mini versions of Tiny Dog already lying around. (I got these from an etsy shop called "sugarcookiedolls").

Favorite foods- I really failed as a mother and did not buy everyone their own personal happy meal from 'Donalds. A classic 10 piece chicken nugget meal are Tiny Dog's favorite. Instead, I cheaped out and only bought cheetos.

Cake- To show Tiny Dog that I value our relationship more than the relationship I have with my own husband, I gave her the top tier to my wedding cake that I had been saving for our first anniversary. I added a glitter "10" on top to add insult to injury. Sorry Kyle!

Here are some photos from my daughter's gorgeous event!

Back to Blogging

Before I botoxed my brow

Hello darkness, my old friend,
It's time to blog on you again.
Because I am so bored and needy,
A hobby to do, while husband's sleeping.
An idea much better left in my brain,
My posts sound like I am quite insane.

I haven't been on this thing since 2013. That's when I got my first reporting job and all my co-workers found my blog. ( My now-husband was one of those co-workers)

The only time I've been more embarrassed was when my mom discovered my Xanga. I guess they're pretty much the same thing.

Five years have past... Not much has changed. My parents are still my only readers and
Tiny Dog is still my only friend. Oh, and I got married. So no more "Foxy Friday" posts for me. :(

If you've accidentally stumbled upon the Dumb Blonde Diaries...Welcome!